As we enter the last few weeks of deep winter, some of us will be battening down our hatches for a different type of storm that will soon be rolling in. You know the one. The one that barricades all the poor minions of Singledom into a psychic deprivation tank and then bombards them with images of other people in love.

I’m talking, of course, about Valentine’s Day.

Now, if you are a person who is in any way satisfied with being single, and you can comfortably opt out of the occasion altogether, I applaud you. But I also know that there are so many women out there, including myself in some of my single years, for whom February 14 is a big, heart-shaped box of pain and misery.

If that particular day on your calendar happens to be marked with a skull and crossbones, here are three things you can do to go from survive to thrive during Hurricane Val:


Let’s begin from a historical perspective. Valentine’s Day as we now know it evolved out of an ancient Roman fertility festival where men would sacrifice a goat, cut its’ hide into strips, dip them in the sacrificial blood, and then run around naked slapping the women and the crops with them. 

Soooo, even if you spend V-Day on your couch crying into a pint of Ben & Jerry’s while watching ‘Love, Actually’, you’re still waaay better off than our Foremothers. So, there’s that.

The deep midwinter is also a time in the natural cycle of life where things begin to grow underground that will come to fruit in the spring harvest. Make a day for yourself to plant the seeds of your clear intentions and desires, and then send them out into the universe.

Make a vision board with quotes and images of your ideal love relationship.Be specific. What does the guardian of your soul look like? What does his voice sound like? Where is he from? Do a visualization where you see him, and ask him to come to you. Write him a letter. The more you can make that love manifest in your mind and heart, the more you will draw those energies to you. 


Seriously. This is an important practice to cultivate. In order for our bodies to be healthy and thrive, it is essential that we learn to shower them with positive loving energy. 

Take the day to thank your body for everything it does for you. Go to a spa. Get a massage. Buy yourself a pair of cashmere pants. Seriously, buy yourself a pair of cashmere pants. Go for a hike or a long walk in nature and saturate yourself with oxygen. Honor your body’s intelligence and beauty.You are the universe expressing itself.


We cannot underestimate the power of friend-love. Our friends keep us going, our friends except us, our friends make us more truly ourselves. There is no reason not to also be emotionally naked with your friends, in fact, it’s really good practice.

Make a Valentine date with a friend or three. Go somewhere nice. When the first round of drinks comes, go around the table and tell each friend what you love about them. Thank them.

Even the laws of physics now show us that gratitude vibrates at a higher frequency than most other emotions, and increases our bodies energy field. Cultivate the love of your friends and that positive energy will attract more love to you.

Whether you do one, all, or even some small measure of these things, some simple shifts in perception can keep your Valentine’s Day from becoming the dreaded Lovepocalypse it may have been in the past, and instead be a meaningful day of reflection and gratitude.

If you’d like to schedule a free one-hour breakthrough call with me, click this link so I can show you how to make sure that, next year, you will be celebrating V-Day with the man of your dreams!

Until then, sending you a heart shaped box of Nakedness.