Tagged ‘humor‘



A big issue with online dating is that people often stop communicating abruptly and for no apparent reason.  Most of my clients just figure that the other person lost interest or that they must of done something to turn the other person off, and they give up.  As hard as it is not to take this stuff personally, you can’t let it get to you.  People stop writing for all kinds of reasons, none of them having to do with you.  Maybe they lost a job, are dealing with family issues, or just got bored .  Let’s be real.  Most of us don’t finish everything we start, especially when it comes to online dating.  When pressed, the same clients who complain about how other people dropped the ball on them admit that they have emails in their inbox that they haven’t answered.

So, let’s say that you started communicating with you were really excited about, and he or she stopped writing.  What can you do.  You can blow them off and just move on which is what a lot of people do, or you can say something.  If you felt like there was potential why wouldn’t you give it a try?  I wouldn’t suggest sending a second email, but one is worth a try.  The thing is that I want  you to stop playing it so safe and take some risks.  The fun in dating is being able to play and not be perfect all the time.  What better place to practice than in emails.  You have nothing to lost on a dating site with someone you’ve never met.  So get online, go through your inbox, and start emailing all those hot men and women who fell by the wayside.

Here are two examples of email threads from clients.  Hope they give you some inspiration.  They worked because they are provocative and playful.  That kind of energy is irresistable!


Since I haven’t heard from you, I thought you might have gotten kidnapped by pygmies and might need some help planning your escape.


Hey!  I was just thinking about you last week, while bound and gagged!  How are you?  Can I give you a call on Monday?


LOL!  Just the way I like my men!  😉 You can reach me after 9pm.  I want to hear the whole story!

Hi, in case you hit your head and have temporary amnesia, I thought I would remind you of the cute, funny girl you were messaging…that would be ME!
OMG, I did have amnesia.  Thanks for reminding me.  Can you ever forgive me?
If you take me to a nice dinner or buy me gifts, I am sure I can forgive anything.  But you have to hurry up and ask me out.  This email has an expiration date and will self-destruct within one week.  :-)

PLEASE post your comments below! And if you would like to set up a free sample session click this button to be directed to my online calendar:




Does Online Dating Work?

Does Online Dating Work?

According to an article that ran In Discovery News, it definitely does!

“In fact, the Internet has become one of the most popular places for people to meet, according to the 2010 large-scale survey How Couples Meet and Stay Together.  (Online dating) definitely works,” said Reuben J. Thomas, an assistant professor of sociology at the City University of New York, who collaborated on the survey. “We estimate that 23 percent of the couples in the U.S. who met in the two years from 2007 to 2009 met online. More people meet online now than meet through school, work, church, bars, parties, et cetera.”

“Online dating sites are all about bringing people together, and sometimes it forms this illusion that with a few clicks of the mouse you can find your soul mate,” Rutgers communications assistant professor Jennifer Gibbs said. “But really, that’s just the first step, and to get to know the person there’s a process of developing a relationship.”

Click here to read the entire article:  Does Online Dating Work

Online dating isn’t the answer to all our dating problems.  It only gets the ball rolling by helping you connect with a wider range of other available singles.  You get to email, IM, and flirt with people all from the comfort  of your own home.  No more need to scour single’s parties, gyms, or bars to meet people.

Internet dating can seem dry and impersonal to some of you, but it is here to stay.  I wouldn’t knock it.  Almost every client I’ve had has complained about Internet dating, only to eventually meet someone online.  It takes time and energy like anything else you do in life.  Don’t expect miracles.  Don’t expect  to put your profile up and get slammed with emails, especially if you are over 45.  Unless you post overtly sexual photos, you might won’t get many emails.  This happens with a lot of my clients.  But these are the clients who eventually meet someone.

Don’t give up.  Slow and steady wins the race.  But while you are out there, don’t keep doing the same things over and over again, expecting different results.  Keep trying new things.  If you aren’t getting hits, hire a professional photographer.  If you are struggling to write your profile, hire a professional writer or have a friend come over and help you write it.  Also, practice making your emails funny and playful.  Humor is very attractive.  You don’t have to be haha funny; try being witty or silly.  What you put out is what you will attract.  If you want a someone to play and laugh with, you need to use the right bait.

As the article says, getting a date is just the beginning.  Once you meet someone, you have to know how to turn that initial connection into a relationship.  This is where the real work begins.  Many people are getting dates online but they don’t know how to create a connection on a date.  If you are struggling to get to the next level, hire a professional coach to help you.  When many of my clients come to me, they can’t get past a first date.  I show my clients all kinds of ways to connect in an emotionally intimate way with their dates and create a connection that can, and often does, turn into a lasting relationship.  I teach my clients Naked Dating.  They learn how to open their hearts and share in a vulnerable and emotionally intimate way.  Almost every single client who works with me comes back and says that the coaching isn’t just helping them with dating, it helps them improve every relationship in their lives.

If you are single and struggling to meet someone, call me today for a sample session and see what Naked Dating can do for you!  And look for my upcoming book:  Naked Dating: Finding True Love with Nothing to Hide

Click here to read the entire article:  Does Online Dating Work

How to Tame Your Imaginary Frenemy (IF)

Teenage boy and girl stick out tongues to each otherDo you really want to know what’s wrong with dating?  Imaginary Frenemies (IF).  Yes, that’s right.  Imaginary Frenemies.  They are the culprits.  These nasty little devils are sabotaging your dating and, frankly, they need to stop.  Everyone has an Imaginary Frenemy.  Your IF is the critical voice in your head that’s part friend, part enemy.  It pretends to be concerned about your well being but then says horrible things about nearly everyone you date.

Most likely, it feels like your IF is trying to protect you by keeping you from getting close to the wrong person.  What’s really happening is that it’s keeping you from getting close to the right person.  You see your Frenemy doesn’t discriminate.  It looks for the negative, and usually finds it.  It says things like, “OMG, he’s sooooo boring!  How can I make him stop talking?”  Or, “She’s so bossy, I don’t know how any man could stand her.”  It zeros in on what’s wrong with someone because, let’s face it, we all have more important things to do than waste time getting to know people who clearly have nothing to offer us.  Or do they?  As long as we keep listening to our IF, we might never know.  We’ll keep walking away from one date after another never knowing or even caring to know the person sitting across from us.  Don’t worry.  You’re not evil.  There’s a very good chance the person sitting across from you is doing the same thing.

The other day, my client, Ali, told me a story about her IF that left me feeling sad.    Ali is a relatively attractive, 30-something, brunette, with an impressive career and a trendy group of friends. Samantha, Ali’s roommate, invited her to meet a couple she thought Ali would like.  Ali wrote off the husband at first sight.  He was a total nerd—as boring as a blank sheet of paper.  He had no panache.  Then there was the wife.  Her velour tracksuit and sneakers were so outdated that she would have been a perfect candidate for a reality show makeover.  When two more couples joined the group, Ali quickly found fault with them, as well.

“Lisa,” Ali said, shaking her head and feeling genuinely remorseful.  “I’m a terrible person.  They were all being so nice to me.  They kept trying to ask me questions and include me in the conversation, and all I wanted to do was leave.  I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn’t stop that horrible voice my head.  What am I going to do?”

Stay tuned for part II of How to Tame Your Imaginary Frenemy.  Find out how Ali rises to my coaching challenge and turns her Frenemy into a friend.  Also, discover some easy techniques to get your IF under control. And finally, learn about how I tamed my Frenemy, a.k.a. “The Shrew.”

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