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Older Women Are More Beautiful

Older Women Are More BeautifulOlder Women Are More Beautiful

“You’ve Got the Cutest Little Babycakes”

This morning I was singing, “You’ve got the Cutest Little Babycakes” to Milo (my Shar-pei) and I wondered, “What are babycakes, anyway?”  Thanks to the modern miracle of Google, I found out. The Online Slang Dictionary had two definitions:

  • Affectionate form of address for a loved one, especially a romantic loved one.
  • The contents of a soiled diaper—I get it, but this was not what I was looking for :-)


I decided to keep searching. The Urban Dictionary was more helpful. They had over 300 definitions for the word babycakes. The closest thing I found to what I was looking for was that babycakes is a term of endearment akin to sweetcheeks. Someone else, who might have taken it a bit literally said, “a small cake that is extremely cute.  Almost too cute to eat.”  While I couldn’t read all 300 and something definitions, I’d like to share my favorite:


Babycakes: an affectionate term for a girlfriend who is awesome beyond measure.

            “Oh hey, babycakes. Why are you made of awesomesauce??”


If this is what it means, I need to ask my husband to start referring to me as Babycakes! I want to be made of awesomesauce!


After I finished writing this, I went back and Googled “who wrote the song ‘You’ve Got the Cutest Little Babycakes,’” and the joke’s on me! Here’s what I found:



Question: What is the song with the words Baby Cakes you Love your little Baby Cakes?


It’s not baby CAKES, it’s baby FACE. :-)

Baby Face, you’ve got the cutest little baby face

There’s not another one could take your place,

Baby face.

My poor heart is jumpin’

You sure have started somethin’.

Baby face, I’m up in heaven when I’m in your fond embrace

I didn’t need a shove cause I just fell in love

With your pretty baby face.


“Baby Face” was written by: Ian Shuttleworth, Mark Yates, Anthony Wright, Leigh Marklew, Harry Akst, Benny Davies


Many people have recorded it including Julie Andrews, Al Jolson, Little Richard, Bobby Darrin, etc.

What do you call your loved ones?  Share and comment below and I will personally respond to you! 

Schedule a relationship coaching session with Lisa

Visit Lisa’s dating & relationship coaching home page

Uncle Sid

Today, I thought I would write about a different kind of love than I usually write about.  Typically, I write about my husband or my dogs or how to find love by dating.  Today, I thought I’d share about one of the other great loves of my life, my Uncle IMG_3733Sid.

Uncle Sid died this morning of pancreatic cancer.  Somehow, I thought it would be easier to lose someone who was 90-years-old, but it’s not, not when we’re talking about a man who was still as vital and alive as Uncle Sid.  Until he was diagnosed with cancer 4 ½ weeks ago, he was still working as a corporate lawyer, driving himself to the office everyday.  He was engaged in the world, keeping abreast of politics and the news, reading 3 newspapers everyday.  Even at age 90, there was no one smarter than Sid when it came to investing in the stock market and buying and selling properties.  And he was still socializing with family and friends.  Whenever we went to dinner with him and my Aunt, Ruth, he would run into at least one tableful of people he knew.

Next to my husband, Uncle Sid was the most important man in my life.  He was like a father to me.  When I was 15, my mother died of breast cancer.  My brother and I went to live with our grandmother, Mimi, until she died six years later.  On her deathbed, Mimi asked her younger brother, Sid, to please take care of my brother and me.

IMG_7658.JPGSid was a busy and important man with a family of his own, but he loved his sister with all his heart, and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.  In the time that he was our trustee, he invested the money my grandmother and mother left us, managing our trust as if we were his own children and watching so that we did not overspend.  Like most people, he also had a darker side.  When Sid got mad, he lit up like the sky on the Fourth of July.  Forgiving these outbursts wasn’t easy, but he was always right and we knew that, even when his approach didn’t feel loving, everything he did came from love.  When he finally resigned his position as trustee, Uncle Sid had more than quadrupled the money that was left to us.  He never asked for so much a thank you.

Like most people, I have suffered my share of disappointments in life.  Through death and other circumstances, my parents weren’t able to be there for me in many of the ways I wanted or needed them to be.  This lack of connection with my biological mother and father has been a great source of sadness throughout my life and is probably why my work as a coach is now centered on helping people open their hearts and connect at the deepest level.

Don’t worry.  I don’t feel sorry for myself.  My life has worked out beautifully, thanks to my guardian angel, my Uncle Sid.  For thirty years he watched over me, as if I was one of his own.  I don’t remember the first time I said, “I love you,” to Uncle Sid,IMG_7656.JPG but I remember that he said it back without hesitation, and from then on that was how we ended our phone conversations.  It always made me so happy to hear him say, “I love you.”  Last week we said, “I love you” for the last time.  My husband and I had just returned from seeing him in St. Louis.  They were still giving him chemotherapy when we left, but the pain had gotten too bad and he knew the end was near.  So, he called to tell us goodbye—that he loved us so much, that we were part of his family, and he was thankful for everything we’d done for Aunt Ruth.  I never knew I’d get a phone call like that where I had to say goodbye to someone for the last time.  You’d think I would have had a million things to say, but I was speechless.  How do you ever say goodbye to the man who profoundly and selflessly helped shape your life?  All I could say was, “Uncle Sid, I love you so much” and “Thank you for everything you did for me.”

Sid comes from a very different and more selfless generation.  He was truly a man of his word.  He had a deep sense of family, honor, and duty.  When I asked him why he never became a judge, he said that, as a lawyer, what was most important to him was to be able to protect the people he loved—his own family and friends.  I have only ever known one other man like him, my husband.  So, I am fortunate to say that I have had two truly great men in my life, my two guardian angels—and now one has flown away.  I love you so much Uncle Sid.  Thank you with all my heart for everything you did for me.  So much of who I have become and how my life has turned out is because of you.  I love you so much.


“Singular City Event Alert”

Check out this fun event going on Saturday. Something neat to do and a great place to meet new people!


Last call to sign up for our horseback ride on Saturday, Feb. 2 at 11 a.m. in Griffith Park followed by lunch at The Caf¨¦ Victory.

Diamond Bar Stables, offers all types of horse rentals and will take us on 2-hour guided trail ride starting at 11 am. They have horses for people with all levels of riding experience, including none! The only requirement is that you be under 250 pounds and at least 7 years old — so most of us qualify!

The stable is located at 1850 Riverside Drive, Glendale, California 91201. Find us at the check in desk.

Following the relaxing, scenic ride, those who like can join us for lunch at Caf¨¦ Victory located at 1608 Victory Blvd, Glendale, CA 91201 (about a mile from the stable).

The cost of the 2-hour ride is $35 — CASH ONLY. Lunch is additional.

For more information about the stables, visit:

For more information about The Caf¨¦ Victory, visit:

If you would like to attend and are a SingularCity member, please RSVP on the community event page at:

If you are not a member or if you have questions, please email:


Schedule an appointment with me today.

Lisa Shield, MA, CPCC
Transformational Dating and Relationship Coach
(323) 939-1770





It doesn’t interest me if there is one God

or many gods.

I want to know if you belong or feel


If you know despair or can see it in others.
 I want to know

if you are prepared to live in the world

with its harsh need

to change you. If you can look back

with firm eyes

saying this is where I stand. I want to know

if you know 
how to melt into that fierce heat of living

falling toward

the center of your longing. I want to know

if you are willing

to live, day by day, with the consequence of love

and the bitter

unwanted passion of your sure defeat.


I have heard, in that fierce embrace, even

the gods speak of God.


— David Whyte

from Fire in the Earth

©1992 Many Rivers Press




I Have a Crush on Lillian Rubin

I am always looking for role models, but they’re not always so easy to find.  Without a doubt, my greatest role model and teacher is my husband.  To me, he is endlessly inspiring and entertaining.  I also look up to my great aunt, Ruth.  I admire her unique combination of honesty –she’s a real straight shooter—and her genuine vulnerability.  She’s one those women who knows how to make men fall in love with her at any age.  (FYI, Aunt Ruth is 83-years young!)  There are others, but this is not the time or place to list them.  Right now, I just want to talk about my latest and greatest hero, Lillian Rubin.

Lillian and I have never met.  I discovered her a couple months ago while doing research for my book, Naked Dating.  Her book, “Intimate Strangers,” blew me away.  It is the best book I’ve ever read on men and women our the struggle to create intimacy.  As a dating and relationship coach, I’ve read many books on the subject, but never one that was as insightful and easy to understand.  I highly recommend it.

Remarkably, Rubin started her career as a psychologist and sociologist when she was fifty.  Over the past 35-years, she has written 12 books.  Rubin’s most recent book, “60 on up: The Truth About Aging in America,” looks at the issue of aging in the US of A.  Below is a fabulous interview with Rubin.  If this is what 84 looks and sounds like…sign me up!  Lillian, you are a true inspiration! – Lillian Rubin: The Truth About Aging

A Somewhat Random Post

iStock_000008227068XSmallThis is a somewhat random post.  I just learned from the latest member of my growing support team, my new blog SEO guy, Glenn, that my blog design is horribly out-of-date.  This news sent me into a tailspin.  So, Glenn.  What you’re telling me is that now I don’t just have to write a book, see clients, be a good wife and dog mother, write for my blog, work on video content, come up with a theme for my animated logo, go to the gym, etc., etc. but now I have to REDESIGN MY BLOG.  Oy vey!

I didn’t think people really read these things.  I just thought that they helped with search engine optimization.  Really.  All I wanted was to keep my website up in the rankings.  You don’t have to read this.  I don’t know if you even need to look at it.  From what I understood it was content, content, content.

As part of my homework, Glenn suggested that I search online for some samples of blogs I like.  This was hands down the best assignment I’ve been given in a long time.  I quickly saw how behind the curve I am, because my search up an entire, unknown (at least to me) universe of blogs, one more fascinating than another.  There are blogs on every subject known to man and woman.  Some are funny, some are raw, and many are shockingly well written.  One of my favorites is You don’t want to miss entry, “The Devil Wore an Orange Tie,” where author, Ruth Pennebaker, talks about how she had the terrifying experience of going to a Karl Rove lecture on Halloween.

Other favorites are:

I would welcome your suggestions of other beautifully designed, funny, or original blogs.   I know I’ve only scratched the surface.  Hey, who needs television?

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