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October, 2015

Vulnerability is Your Greatest Strength

Vulnerability is Your Greatest Strength

Vulnerability is Your Greatest Strength

 

Life is Short

Life is Short

Why Rushing Into Relationships Rarely Works

 

Why Rushing Into Relationships Rarely Works

Why Rushing Into Relationships Rarely Works

So, you finally connected with someone you actually like online and you can barely contain your enthusiasm. Even if you wanted to stop yourself from getting sucked into a vortex, you can’t. All you can do is obsess over him and wonder if he’s The One. He’s totally your type—tall and dark with those slanty, puppy dog eyes you love so much. Besides, you’re already LOL-ing at his every text. At this point, you wouldn’t even consider dating anyone else. You have to see where it goes. And anyway, you’re not the type who can date more than one person at a time. So what if a week ago you didn’t even know each other? For the past six days you’ve been leaping out of bed in the morning, grabbing for your phone like some junkie desperate for a fix, then breathing a sigh of relief at the sight of his texts: “Hey Babe! Off to work. Just checkin in. Wassup tonight? Wanna catch a movie?” Knowing that you were the first person he was thinking of each morning makes you tingle from head to toe. He’s your new best friend and the two of you haven’t even met yet. This happens all the time in the dating world.

I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how the rest of this story ends… but I will. More often than not our heroine—that would be you—crashes and burns. Either she goes out and sleeps with him right away, and he disappears or she tells him she’s not that kind of girl and that she is looking for a committed relationship, and he disappears. Next comes the fatal morning when she wakes up, checks her phone, and just like that there’s no cute text waiting from him. No matter how much she tells herself that she shouldn’t take it personally, she can’t help but think she must have done something wrong.

I was that woman once. I didn’t have the first clue about how to look for a life partner. Like a lot of the women I coach, I got sucked into the instant relationship vortex all the time. I just figured that, if a guy was paying attention to me, it must mean that he thought I was special. I wanted a relationship so badly that I never stopped to think this might not be the case. It took me a long time to figure out that I was making a lot of assumptions about the way men think that were just plain wrong.

I am not telling you that these things never work out. All I am saying is that you might save yourself a lot of time and heartache by slowing down and entering into your next relationship in a more conscious way.

So, let’s break this scenario down and look at some of the mistakes you might be making:

  1. Mistake #1: Assuming that when a man pursues you it means he wants to have a relationship with you.

We hear it all the time: men love “the chase.” Supposedly, it’s how they’re wired. It has something to do with stalking and hunting behaviors from bygone days. In truth, most women love being pursued by men, too, because it triggers our need to feel desired. But just because a man shows interest, you can’t assume that he wants to have a relationship with you. By and large, women are seeking committed relationships while most men are actively looking for sexual conquests. If a man happens to meet someone special and he is ready for a commitment, he might go for it, but this isn’t his main agenda. You have to be aware that even good guys will sleep with you if they think you’re hot and you’re willing to put out. So, if you’re serious about finding a life partner, you need to slow down and find out if the guy you’re falling for is really interested in getting to know you or if he’s just interested in sleeping with you. If he’s only interested in sex, it isn’t going to go anywhere, no matter how excited he seems in the beginning. You can be sure that, when the conquest is over, your love story will abruptly and tragically come to an end.

  1. Mistake #2: Assuming that just because a man is texting you all day everyday, he’s interested in getting to know you.

Texting might be one the very best things that ever happened to men. They can seduce women and ask them out on dates without ever having to actually speak to them. In fact, just by texting a woman at frequent intervals, a man can hook her into thinking he’s interested in her. Be careful. Don’t make these texts mean more than they do. You can’t assume that just because a man is texting you, it means he’s interested in really getting to know you. How do you know that some guy you just met isn’t sending the same morning text to five other women? I’m not telling you this to make you more suspicious of men. I am telling you this because you need to take care of yourself and start to enter into relationships with both eyes and ears open and both feet on the ground.

  1. Mistake #3: Assuming that just because a guy is crazy about you he’s right for you.

Even if he is pushing hard, moving fast, and showing you a lot of interest, you cannot assume that he’s your soul mate. In fact, many men intentionally try to sweep us off our feet. The faster they move, the less time we have to think about whether or not they’re really a good fit for us. Many men will come at you hard and fast and try to sweep you off your feet because it reduces the risk of rejection for them. Given enough time, you would probably decide that a cute starving artist isn’t really worth the time and trouble. Especially after you go to dinner a couple of times and he starts forgetting his wallet.

  1. Assuming that just because you’re ready for an instant relationship he is, too.

Just because someone shows interest in you, it doesn’t automatically mean you’re the only person he’s interested in dating. There’s a huge leap between finding a person attractive and wanting to be in a relationship with that person. Even if someone does want to explore a relationship with you right away, you need to slow it down. Two people shouldn’t be exclusive right out of the starting gate. They should pace themselves and space out their dates to one or two a week for the first few weeks. It boggles my mind to see how people are so quick to create what I refer to as instant relationships, to go from not knowing someone at all to texting each other morning, noon, and night—all within in a matter of days. I know you want to get off the dating scene and start building a future with someone, but you need to be careful about who you let into your life. Take the time to get to know someone and rush into a relationship with anyone.

Staying grounded when some totally hot guy is showing a lot of interest in you can be hard, but recovering from the disappointment of your failed expectations can be even harder. Many guys out there know how to play into our romantic fantasies and sweep us off our feet. Hey, who doesn’t love a hot romance, but finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with probably won’t result from some instant relationship. It’s up to you to keep your wits about you and resist the urge to fall into that vortex. Slow down and find a great man who is on the same page as you are. This way you’ll have someone who wants to write a storybook romance with you!

If you get anxious and rush into relationships too fast, book a consultation with me to learn how to manage your anxiety so you can find a relationship that will last!

Why Rushing Into Relationships Rarely Works

 

Make a Man Fall for You… Without Taking off Your Clothes

Make a Man Fall for You Without Taking off Your Clothes

Make a Man Fall for You… Without Taking off Your Clothes

If two consenting adults want to have safe sex, it’s their choice. But, if you’re really serious about finding the love of your life, jumping into the sack too soon with some hottie you just started dating can definitely slow you down. It can cause you to waste precious time in sexual relationships with people who aren’t marriage or partnership material. So, if you’re clear that you are looking for lasting love and you know you don’t want to sleep with a man until you’re in an exclusive relationship, what are some of the things you can say or do to make him want to wait for you? How do you build the kind of emotional intimacy with a man that you’re longing for? How can you leave a lasting impression so that he can’t get you out of his mind? Here are four ways to make a man fall for you… without taking off your clothes!

  1. Stroke his ego

Stroking a man’s ego can be just as titillating as stroking another other part of him. Really. Men want to hear how fabulous they are to us just as much as women want to hear how beautiful and desirable we are to them. With that in mind, look for things that really impress you about your date and tell him what you see. Don’t be afraid to compliment and acknowledge the things you like about him. Tell him how much you loved his online dating profile and that, if he ever wanted to change careers, he could always become a comedy writer. Tell him how much you love the restaurant he chose or that you’re impressed by how he knows his way around a wine list. If he’s really into yoga, tell him that it’s doing wonders for his body. Stroke away, but make sure your compliments are genuine and that you mean what you say. The perfect compliment should be intimate and make the other person feel a little naked, like you really see him and like who he is. The more you stroke a man’s ego, the better he will feel and the more he will want to spend time with you.

  1. Listen to his stories

Men reveal themselves through the stories they tell. When you’re on a date and a man is telling you a story about something that happened in his life, he’s not just reporting an event, he’s trying to shape your view of him. If he tells you about how he calls his mom every Sunday to check on her, it’s because he wants you to see what a thoughtful son he is. If he tells you how he handled a serious situation at work, he wants you to see what a savvy businessman he is. Tell him know how impressed you are by him. Say, “Your mother is so lucky to have a son like you!” Or, “That’s an amazing story about how you caught your company’s accountant embezzling all that money!” Make it a practice on every date to listen to the man sitting across from you and ask yourself, “Why is this man telling me this story? What is he trying to convey about who he is and what he values in life?” It’s not just about listening to your date; it’s about the quality of your listening and what you’re listening for. An excellent way to get a man to feel an emotional connection with you is to really listen to his stories, ask yourself what is he saying about himself, and to tell him what you heard.

  1. Mirror his masculinity back to him

The next time you’re on a date, you want to appreciate all things masculine about the man sitting across from you. What does that mean? Well, men are big on words like integrity, strength, virility, success, and honesty. They pride themselves on being protectors and providers. They are all about values, principles, and accomplishments. Mirroring a man’s masculinity back to him, is about appreciating all the little (and big) things about him that make him a man—the way he tries to protect you by taking your hand before crossing a busy street or how he thinks about you by texting you the address to restaurant where you’re meeting. Be sure to acknowledge these gestures. Don’t just expect him to buy your coffee or pay for your dinner and your valet parking. Be appreciative and impressed by the things he does for you. Perhaps the greatest way we can reflect back a man’s masculinity is by flirting with him. Men need to feel sexually desired as much as women do. When my husband and I were dating, we would play a kind of verbal tug-of-war:

        He’d be sitting on the couch and say, “Come over here.”

        I’d say, “Why?”

        And then he’d say, “Because I’m the man and you’re supposed to come to me.”

        So I’d say, “Where did you get that from?”

        And he’d tease, “I bought you dinner, you have to do what I ask.”

And then I’d walk over to him. I always let him win… because men like to feel like they’ve got the upper hand and that we’re willing to be vulnerable.

  1. Be a soft place for him to land

Here’s the deal: women say they want a strong man who is also emotionally available, but it often seems like this is a contradiction in terms. We tell men that we want them to be in touch with their emotions, but when a man opens up and shares how bad things are at work or that he’s feeling depressed, we don’t like what we hear. What we really want is for our men to be our rocks and hold it together. Unfortunately, men have issues, stresses, and problems just like us, and most of them don’t open up emotionally and share with their other male friends. So, they need women they can talk to, women who won’t judge them or think less of them when they’re having a tough time. When you’re on a date and a man shares some of his stresses or problems don’t think of it as a burden, think of it as an honor. Even if your date is over sharing, be respectful and remember that he may not have anyone else he can talk to. You don’t ever have to see him again, but remember that many men in our culture don’t get as many opportunities to share their inner world in the same way women do. I think it’s beautiful when a strong, capable man can feels like he can let down his guard and be tender with me. My mother was a ball breaker, and I had to learn how to be a soft place for a man to land, a safe haven where he can come to talk about the things he can’t talk about with anyone else. If you want a man to want to see you again and again, you need to practice having patience and being compassionate. You can be the sexiest woman in the room, but at the end of the day men want to marry women who are tender and kind. When a man feels like you’re the sort of woman who is soft, compassionate, and able to validate his feelings without scrutiny, he’ll find you irresistible.

When it comes to love, men are just as insecure as we are. They want to be with women who make them feel good, plain and simple. But you can make a man feel good without getting between the sheets. Put these four tips to use, make him feel like the best version of himself when he’s around you, and he’ll be ready and willing to wait!

Click here to book a consult with Lisa and find out how you can make a man fall for you:

Make a Man Fall for You... Without Taking off Your Clothes

Three Types of Relationships

 

Three Types of RelationshipsThree Types of Relationships

There are essentially three types of relationships: Traditional, Conscious, and Transcendent.  Each serves it’s own purpose, and one isn’t necessarily better than another. It all depends on what you are looking for. Some people are perfectly content to have a traditional or companionship-style relationship and they don’t aspire to anything more. Take a look at the descriptions below and ask yourself what kind of relationship you’re in and what kind of relationship you would like to be in.  Remember, some people can’t or don’t want to do the necessary work too get to the next level.  The question is, are you willing to do what it takes to get emotionally naked and have the relationship of your dreams?

LEVEL 1:  

TRADITIONAL RELATIONSHIP

In Traditional Relationships, two people are primarily companions who come together because they enjoy each others company.  The focus in this type of relationship is on shared interests and values rather than personal growth.  In Traditional Relationships, neither person has done the necessary psychological or spiritual work to bond deeply either with themselves or another.  This means that the couple connects at the personality rather than the emotional and spiritual levels.  When two people relate from the personality or “I” level, the individual’s focus remains on him or herself rather than on the partner.  Each person in a Traditional Relationship is primarily focused on getting his or her own needs met. This prevents the “we” of the relationship from forming.  As a result these relationships often become stagnant and power struggles frequently occur.  To remain together, partners in Traditional Relationships avoid looking at key issues, pretending they don’t exist.  Many couples feel safe and secure in a Traditional Relationship.  It is all they ever want or need and they can remain at this level forever.  These couples will not naturally progress to the next two levels of relationship.  Traditional Relationships end when one partner embarks on his or her psycho-spiritual journey and it becomes impossible to continue growing while remaining in the relationship.

LEVEL 2:

CONSCIOUS RELATIONSHIP

Soul mates are two people who relate to each other at the soul or spiritual level.  When soul mates come together, they form a Conscious Relationship.  Many people say they would love to meet their “soul” mate, but this is easier said than done. To have a Conscious Relationship, both people must have done some psychological and spiritual (psycho-spiritual) work prior to meeting so they can truly relate soul-to-soul with a partner. In a Conscious Relationship, people are engaged in learning lessons. The focus is on emotional and spiritual growth both as an individual and as a couple.  The goal is to transcend the physical and emotional levels so both partners can connect on the spiritual plane.  As they actively work through issues together, Conscious Couples become increasingly able to lean in and trust one another to create the “we” of the relationship.  One of the biggest challenges for Conscious Relationships is that, because both partners are transitioning from being “I”-focused to becoming “we”-focused, power struggles can occur. It can be challenging to shift from focusing primarily on one’s own individual needs to including another person in one’s decision making process. Conscious Relationships do not necessarily last forever.  They can end when both partners are no longer able to grow together or when one person does not meet the other person’s essential needs.  However, reaching the level of Conscious Partnership is a significant accomplishment, and it can lead to a nourishing and lasting relationship.

LEVEL 3:

TRANSCENDENT RELATIONSHIP

Not everyone wants to do the work to reach this third level.  Transcendent Partners are two people who love one another unconditionally.  They are “guardians of each others souls.”  Because Transcendent Partners have mastered the art of taking personal responsibility, they generate their identity, happiness and emotional stability from within and there is no fear of losing themselves in the relationship.  With such a strong sense of their individual selves, Transcendent Partners can fully surrender to the “we” of the relationship, forming a union where the individual is not lost and the whole is profoundly greater than the sum of its parts.  Skilled in unconditional acceptance, power struggles rarely occur. Transcendent Partners fully support each other in going for their dreams.  They live in truth and can share anything without fear of shame or blame.  Transcendent Partners relate at the spiritual level and have evolved beyond the need to work on the relationship.  Both partners are guided not by outer but by inner forces and by each other.  Knowing that what they have together is enough, Transcendent Partners are content and can commit to one another for life.  Transcendent Partnership is focused in gratitude and on giving back to society.  There are few models in our society for this type of partnership.  Conscious Partners can and do evolve into Transcendent Partnership when both people do their individual work.  You have not failed if you achieve a Traditional or Conscious Relationship.   Transcendent Partnership is not and should not be for everyone.

 

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The Three Types of Relationships

 

 

 

Older Women Are More Beautiful

Older Women Are More BeautifulOlder Women Are More Beautiful

Should I Sleep with a Man on the Fourth Date?

Should I sleep with a man on the fourth date?

Should I Sleep with a Man on the Fourth Date?

Dear Lisa, 

I’m at my wits end! I’m a classy, attractive, successful woman. Nothing about the way I dress or act says “I’ll jump into bed with you.” But it seems like every guy I start dating expects me to sleep with him after the third or fourth date and bails when I don’t give in! I was recently seeing a man I was really excited about. I thought I’d finally met a really good guy. On our fourth date, we were having such a great time that he invited me to his place for a glass of wine after our hike. I questioned whether or not I should go, but he’d been such a gentleman that I didn’t think it would be a problem. When we got there, he said he was sweaty and needed to take a shower. Then, he proceeded to undress right in front of me. As if that wasn’t enough, he asked me if I wanted to join him. I tried to make a joke about how I was pretty sure he knew how to shower by himself, but I could tell by the scowl on his face that he didn’t like my response. When he returned, he acted cold and indifferent. I felt like he was a different person. I tried to smooth it over by explaining that I’ve rushed into sex too soon and it just hasn’t worked for me, but nothing I said could break the tension. Finally, I left and I haven’t heard from him since.  Another guy right I was dating around the same time also disappeared after the fourth date when I told him I didn’t want to go back to his house. Is something wrong with me? Should I sleep with a man on the fourth date?

I’m 35 and tired of messing around. I know from experience that I get emotionally attached when I have sex, so I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t go to bed with someone until I felt ready and I knew he was interested in a relationship. I want to stick to my guns, but I’m starting to feel like I’m going to be single forever! Maybe there is something wrong with me! Please help!

 –Rebecca 

 

Dear Rebecca,

Thanks for your email. I want to applaud you for not letting someone pressure you into having sex before you’re ready. From where I stand, there’s nothing wrong you at all! It sounds to me like these men are just showing you their true colors. If they were interested in more than sex they would have stuck around.

No matter how nice these men seemed on the surface or how good they were at romancing you, if they didn’t ask you out again just because you refused to have sex, they weren’t your future husband. There’s a big difference between romancing or seducing a woman and having a long-term relationship with her. You’re looking for a man who is willing to wait for sex until she’s ready and who will invest the time and energy to really get to know her.

It’s jaw dropping when I hear about how quickly people have sex today when they say they’re looking for a life partner. For many people, sex clouds their judgment and causes them to bond with the wrong partners. If you’re looking for the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, you need to develop an emotional connection before you have sex.

When clients see me as a dating coach, I encourage them to wait two to three months before sleeping with someone they are considering having a relationship with. This is what Naked Dating® is all about; its about learning to share your head before you share your bed.

Rebecca, there are plenty of men out there who are ready and willing to wait for the right woman. My advice to you is to keep dating, trust your gut, and don’t compromise your principles for anyone!

With love,

Lisa

If you need help navigating the wonderful world of dating, set up a consult today to find out how I can help:

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Don’t Fall Victim to These 6 Dating Traps

Don't Fall Victim to these 6 Dating Traps

Don’t Fall Victim to these 6 Dating Traps

A lot of current dating advice seems to encourage women to play games and dumb themselves down in order to attract a man—don’t be too available, don’t initiate, don’t return his calls, don’t be anxious, don’t be too independent… If I had been reading some of this stuff when I dated fifteen years ago, I don’t know if I ever would have gone out on a single date!

When I dated fifteen years ago, I was getting my master’s degree in Spiritual Psychology and I was involved in some other spiritually based programs. So, I saw the dating process as an extension of the spiritual journey I was on. Instead of pondering the differences between men and women, I viewed every date as a chance to become more open and vulnerable with men–even if I never saw the guy again. I practiced being grateful, kind, playful, positive, warm, and diplomatic–all qualities a man would find attractive.

At first glance, some of what I’ve written below might not sound all that different from what you’ve read elsewhere, but read it carefully. Most of what I am saying isn’t about what to do or not do on a date; it has to do with the mindset you have while dating. We create what we focus on. So, it is important to set the right intentions for yourself as you date. If what you’re focusing on is getting a big ring, that’s what you’ll attract. If you focus on finding a passionate, unconditionally loving relationship, that’s what you will attract. I am not saying you can’t have both, but you need to be clear about your intentions. You need to be honest with yourself about what you’re seeking and why you’re seeking it or you just might wind up with a chunk of ice on your finger and a hole in your heart. My suggestion is this: focus on attracting unconditional love and everything else will fall into place!

#1: If you just go out on enough dates, you will eventually meet the right person

If you’ve got issues and baggage that you haven’t dealt with, it’s not going to bring you any closer to the kind of relationship you’re truly looking for. The real goal with dating is to keep evolving; it’s not about repeating the same thing over and over again expecting different results, but coming back from each date and being honest with yourself. I encourage my clients to ask themselves questions after each date, such as “What did I learn about myself?” “What did I learn about dating?” “How can I start opening up with my dates and become more emotionally naked and vulnerable?” Use the dating process as an opportunity to grow and evolve, so that when you do meet the right person you’ll be ready.

#2: A man will lose respect for a woman if she sleeps with him right away

Many men say that, if they’re really into a woman, they don’t care how soon they have sex. The real reason not to sleep together early on is because sex gets in the way of building emotional intimacy, and this is the most important part of any relationship. Most people don’t know how to open up and be vulnerable with someone they are attracted to. They are afraid that, if someone they’re dating sees something he or she doesn’t like, the person will leave. So, they have sex instead. I encourage both men and women to wait to have sex so that they can learn how to get emotionally naked first. Vulnerability is what will lead to deeper intimacy and ultimately keep two people together in the long run. It will also lead to better and more connected sex.

#3: Let the man be the man

Men aren’t from Mars and women aren’t from Venus. We’re both from planet Earth. We actually want the same things; we just go about getting our needs met differently. We both want safety, trust, good communication, compassion (and passion), and empathy. When I was dating, I was never burdened by concerns about whether I was being “feminine enough” or “letting the man be the man.” The question I always asked myself was, “Is my behavior attractive?” Was I being anxious, overbearing, controlling, self absorbed…? These behaviors are unattractive, and they have nothing to do with being a man or a woman. It is important to note that the answers men and women get when they ask the question, “Is this attractive behavior?” will be different. What a man will feel is attractive (or unattractive) behavior for him and what a woman thinks is attractive behavior for her are not the same. As they keep exploring this question, their natural feminine or masculine tendencies will start to emerge.

#4: To attract an alpha male you have to be a passive female

There is an endless stream of information telling women that the way to make men feel feel empowered is to stop being strong and assertive and start being passive and submissive. The problem is that women are no longer stuck in the house raising babies. They are taking over universities and, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, about 40 percent of working wives currently out-earn their husbands. Even if a woman wants to take a more passive role, it’s getting harder and harder to do so. When a woman is in charge of an entire team of people at work, its ludicrous to think that she should have to sit around and wait for a man to make the first move. That’s exactly what Whitney Wolfe thought when she invented Bumble, the first dating APP where single women initiate contact with single men. There is a difference between being a strong and independent woman and being controlling or domineering. A truly confidant man will find a strong, capable woman attractive. He won’t try to clip her wings or hold her back so that he can feel like the dominant one in the relationship. He also won’t mind when the check comes for dinner and she says, “This one’s on me!”

#5: There are rules for dating

There are no rules for dating and there is no one size fits all strategy. Some people are not assertive and they have to learn how to be more so, some people are very aggressive and they need to learn to tone it down. As you embark on this quest to find unconditional love it’s all about finding out what works for you and focusing on the change you need to make to be a better person—and, eventually, a better partner. My advice for one client might be very different than my advice to another. What I’m trying to do is get people in touch with their own personal truths and help them start living authentically from that place so they can attract the kind of partner who is right for them. The truth is that you can’t live by someone else’s rules in life or in dating. You have to learn to trust and follow your own heart.

#6: Dating is about getting someone to commit

The focus of dating should not be on getting a ring or getting someone to commit. Yes, eventually you want to get into a committed relationship, but first you need to get to know someone and see if you’re a good match. People today have instant gratification syndrome. They want everything, NOW! But it doesn’t work that way. There is no fast track when it comes to relationships. Slow is fast. I truly believe dating is an exercise in learning how to let go and not take things so personally. It’s about learning to accept other people, letting go of your judgments, blocks, and barriers, and becoming a more open, loving person. Take it from me—I went on almost 100 first dates before I met the love of my life. Patience truly is a virtue! As you become a more open, loving person, you will attract the love you want. In the meantime, stop focusing on the outcome and start using the dating process as an opportunity to grow.

 

 

Are you struggling with dating and need advice? Book a consultation and see how I can help!

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28 Things Every Woman Wishes Her Man Knew

28 things every woman wishes her man knew

28 Things Every Woman Wishes Her Man Knew

Let’s face it: women are way more confusing than men. We expect you to know the answers to questions we aren’t even sure of. Sometimes, figuring us out can seem as impossible as trying to solve a Rubix Cube blindfolded. This week, we thought we would throw you dirty dogs a bone and give you the Cliffs Notes to understanding women. Here are 28 things every woman wishes her man knew about her. If you think these are tough, you should see the 5,098 other tips we left on the cutting room floor!

  1. We never get to the point. Is there a point?
  1. We’re emotional. Deal with it.
  1. Silence is torture for most of us. The majority of women are talkers.
  1. We never get tired of hearing how good we look.
  1. Beyoncé was channeling the divine truth when she sang the words, “If you want it you better put a ring on it.”
  1. If you want to be guaranteed to get some at the end of the night, you gotta ratchet up the romance.
  1. We drop hints about the things we want you to do for us all the time… and we love a guy who picks up on them.
  1. Sending flowers can only make up for so much… then you need to send those little blue boxes, the kind that say “Tiffany & Co.” on them.
  1. Flowers on anniversaries and birthdays are to be expected, but smart guys send anytime with notes that say, “Just because I love you.” You score extra points if you send them to our office where all our coworkers can see them.
  1. Texting is fine, but if we’re into you, we would love you to pick up the phone so we can hear your voice.
  1. It’s easy to find younger women attractive, but what we really want to hear is how you think women get more beautiful as they get older.
  1. If you lock your phone or put it face down in front of us, it’s just going to make us curious.
  1. Men who can cook are sexy.
  1. We don’t respect a man who will let us walk all over him, and we can sense it from a mile away.
  1. A lot of us still think you should make the first move… and pay for dinner, especially while you’re courting us.
  1. Most of the time, we aren’t looking for answers. We just want you to listen and tell us everything will be okay.
  1. We will never think your burp and fart jokes are funny.
  1. We want to feel protected. We expect you to call us after a fight, even if we started it.
  1. If we’re in a relationship and we try to push you away, we really don’t want you to go. We you want you to fight for us.
  1. We tell you how strong and independent we are, but we really don’t want to be that that way that with you.
  1. I know we make it look easy, but looking this good takes time. Don’t rush us when we have a mascara wand in our hand.
  1. No matter how many clothes are in the closet, we’ll never have anything to wear.
  1. We will never own enough pretty, sparkly things.
  1. If you don’t want us to act like your mother, start acting like a man.
  1. PMS is a real thing, but some of us have been known to use it our advantage.
  1. The “Hallmark” of a great guy is one that knows his way around a greeting card.
  1. Don’t take it personally if you can’t get us off. It’s not as easy for us as it is for you.
  1. Also try not to take it so personally when we turn you down. We might be PMS-ing or we might be feeling fat. Sometimes we just can’t face the one-eyed monster.

 

I’m sure you could tell us a thing or two about what men would like us to know about them… if we would just let you get a word in edgewise! 😉

 

Are you having trouble connecting with the opposite sex? Book a free consultation with me today.

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Facing Your Fears

Facing Your Fears

Facing Your Fears

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